Off to see Fife

I typed that last post when I got back to work, and I’m typing this one from work also. I know I shouldn’t be blogging at work but this whole thing has my head spinning, and I need to get it all out. I’ve texted D and B, but they’re at work and haven’t responded. 

I guess Sarah’s always been this way. Did you know that M was the first person I ever slept with? It was in school, and we didn’t want to be virgins any longer, so we decided to get drunk and lose our virginity to each other. It was quite sweet, but also very practical as we were good friends and remained so.

In Uni, Sarah wasn’t interested in M at all, until she found out that I had been with M, then suddenly he was all she could talk about. Then the next thing you know they’re together. Plus there was the whole thing in Thailand where she became a raging vegan and dumped M for a yoga instructor.

I’m just so upset that she told Pete not to say anything so they could keep mooching off me.

I mean, I can understand if Pete’s freaked out because he’s torn between feeling for Sarah and loyalty to me. I’m totally going through the same thing with Fife.

Oh, god. I need to talk to Fife. This has all become such a mess. I should text him, or phone him. I need to tell him what happened with Pete. That Pete’s out of my life. But should I say that I only broke up with Pete because he’s shagging my best friend? That doesn’t sound too good on my part, because I was going to break up with him anyway. They just beat me to it. But I need to be honest. That’s the new motto going forward – honesty first.

But what about him and his wife? That’s a totally separate issue. Can I live with a man who’s still living with his sort-of-ex-wife? I can’t ask him to not be near his children, and he needs to make the decision about the divorce — I can’t do that for him. But I really like him. A lot. And he’s stable and generous and lovely and sexy and smart and funny and well all kinds of wonderful stuff.

I need to talk to Fife in person. I’ll go over to his house. He felt comfortable showing up at my house on Saturday, so I can go to his house.

I’ll text Loraine and tell her I’m not feeling well. I need the afternoon off. (I know, skiving from work is not good, but I NEVER take days off, and I’m sure I have some annual leave due.)

Right, that’s me off to see Fife.


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