Yeah for Stalkers

I hate Scotland this time of year. I hate the UK this time of year. The weather is horrible. Wet and grey from 8am to 4pm and then dark and windy the rest of the time. It’s so depressing. And sitting in an office which is being monitored by the Great and Powerful Oz is just way too stressful.

MacDraggyFeet tried to go in to RobotPA’s office/cupboard to ask a question, and she was told not to enter without an appointment. So, if we want to speak with this person who is residing ten feet from us, but from behind a closed door, we have to book in an appointment through an online system.

Maybe I should become a consultant. It’s  a license to act like an arsehole and get away with it because you’re an ‘expert’.

Oh, and this is hilarious. Patch has toned down his whole ‘It’s because I’m a Dad’ and ‘Aren’t we just jovial mates, but I’m really mocking you behind your back’ routines. He’s gotten really quiet because he’s officially got a stalker.

He received two dozen roses his morning with a note that read ‘For all the ways I appreciate you.’ What’s even funnier, he knew immediately they weren’t from his wife. And, he didn’t say it in his happy martyr ‘Oh, you know the boss. She’s a stern task master’ sort of way. He just said, ‘My wife wouldn’t send these,’ and was quite freaked out.

I asked him if he’d been talking to anyone about helping to get their book published. Even if it was off the cuff. Or, just to be nice. I learned back at MNM, that people take their writing very seriously and can get quite emotional about it. You have to be careful what you tell people and not lead them on. There are also people who will go to extraordinary lengths to get the attention of an agent. They become a bit desperate and don’t realize their actions are not eye-catching, but creepy.

Patch said that he’d mentioned his new job to a few people down the pub, and at the gym, and out at a party, and maybe to a couple of people in his kids play groups. So, yeah, it could be anyone.

He’s keeping his mouth shut for a while, and he’s digging through the slush pile right now to see if anyone has sent a query directly to him.

There are several good things to come out of Patch being stalked. 1) He’s shut the fuck up and I don’t have to hear about him being a dad or a right good jolly chap. 2) He’s actually looking at the slush pile, our client list, and potential vendors. (He may be doing this for the wrong reasons, but at least he’s doing it.) 3) BigEyes is having a field day getting him a cup of tea, a little shoulder rub, popping out to get him a sandwich. Anything to help calm him down, which means she’s staying out of my way.

So, I’d like to say thank you to Patch’s admirer. You’ve made my life easier.

PS-More on this later, but Legend is back from the Continent and I’m meeting her next week. I’m actually hoping to get Legend and MyAuthor working on a collection of short stories together. Have been chatting with a publisher about it and it would be truly amazing. Short stories are back in vogue (who knew they went out of vogue) and collections are getting noticed. (And on a business note, it’s the sort of thing that would be included in University Literature curriculum around the world, and that’s the best way to get a steady life-time income. Get on school syllabi.)

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