Category Archives: New Neighbour

Who’s gotten drunk dialled?

Here’s a little trick I’ve learned to avoid hangovers, don’t go to bed. And don’t pass out. If you can avoid that it works a treat. The problem may then be a general sleepiness after the adrenalin wears off.

The plan was, go to the shop, come home, nap for an hour and then cook dinner for Candy (which you’ll remember was my cunning plan for keeping her away from talking to HP on the phone, but I’m much less paranoid about HP and Candy than I had been, but I’ll get to that in the moment. Actually, I’ll just tell you now…) Continue reading

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I’d remember Manchester

UberPA, for those who are wondering, has a delightful personality. She sat at a spare desk all day, moved only for allotted breaks, which consisted of a quick trip to the loo. For lunch, she set her watch, powered down her computer, ate a yogurt, then sat there until her watch beeped. She then turned her computer on and went back to working.

We didn’t speak, other than the first exchange, for the rest of the day. Yeah, stellar personality. Continue reading

Candy the Cougar

So, here’s the story. Candy was married to a man who she’s known since she was a kid. Got married young. He wanted children and she didn’t, waited until she got to an age in which she couldn’t have kids and ran off with a woman half his age so he could breed (as she put it). They sold the house and she’s in the flat next door while she looks for a place to buy. ‘Good riddens,’ she said, ‘never had sex with anyone else and wasn’t getting any from him in the end. No point in letting this sponge dry up.’ Points to her crotch.

Yeah, she’s classy like that. Continue reading

Legend and Candy

Right, so I started blogging earlier, and I had to stop because the Intern showed up. What the hell. She was supposed to work from 10 to 12 each day, and she shows up at 12 because her bus was late. Geezus and rice, even if she lived on the edge of Dundee she could have walked to work in two hours. Where the fuck does she live that it takes her two hours to get to work. Dundee is so small, it doesn’t take two hours to get anywhere. She is so taking the mick. Continue reading